How do we hold on to our masculinitywhen it's been taken from us when a so called alpha male somebody comes in ourlives embarrasses us perhaps it's in the workplace perhaps it's in front of ourwoman perhaps they heckle our girl how do we deal with this in the way where wedon't compromise our masculinity we remain strong and we move into the rightchoices where we live a good life a powerful life and one that facilitates adialogue of excellence and this is what the daily awesome is about that's whatthis podcast is about and what we're talking about today how do we deal withthe so-called alpha male when he steps on our toes without resorting toviolence it's one of the greatest life skills that you're ever gonna learnwe're gonna break it down for you step by step but first the daily awesome is apodcast about men's development and achieving excellence we have communitiesin fact where this this question came from is one of our free communities youcan find out all about that on our free stuff link down below where you canwatch the video of this you can also get the time code to the the liner notes ofall this so the slides that you see on the screen if you're watching our videoyou can watch all that and if you listen on itunes or stitcher you can actuallyget the slides of that it's pretty cool but more importantly you can join ourfree videos man our free video series and courses on all events developmentare free PDFs on all of men's development but you can join the Austinmen's development group and October first is when we're recording this onSunday we actually have a call for men's development excellence groups or ourstarter groups which you can find out also on that free stuff link be a partof what we're doing man this is an amazing family and we have one of thegreatest things in the happening right here and almost everyday of the week it's it's awesome community of men achieving excellencelet's get to this so bill an amazing guy who's a part of Austin men's dumb andhe's been a part of us for about 18 months he writes in very wise man by theway he should listen so Steve I was wondering if you could do a piece onyounger man dealing with so-called alpha males that they work with that theyencounter that when somebody heckles their girlfriend or assaults theirmasculinity in front of co-workers in front of friends where they getembarrassed or put down in certain situations how do they deal with thiswithout guns without karate without violence without judo and swords how dowe evolve to better our minds and our expressions and see this is one of thegreatest life skills cuz it's gonna happen to you you as a man if you putyourself out there in the world are going to be challenged on all differentlevels and so many men say like oh man I'm sick of being bullied I want to betough I want to fight I want to kick ass and this isn't the answer I'm gonna giveyou so you need to be men who are wise if you think that you need those thingsyou don't know the consequence of the Macumber go now I love fighting and I'vebeen in a lot of real fights and I don't want to be in anymoreI love competitive fighting I've done all sorts of JKD PFS and kickboxingjiu-jitsu still do it and I respect it I love it man it's a beautiful thing to doin a ring and in some sort of controlledenvironment but on the street it's a little bit different I've been in enoughof those to know that I don't want it anything you see so many men want thisto define themselves they want the toughness because we have a lack ofpower so we get in all these fights it's a bit of the mentality of the bully weekwe pick fights that we know we can win we pick fights that we know have noconsequence we get in fights online we get in fights with ideology we get andwe use our essence of man that is saying express yourself but we do in ways thatwe don't put it on on the line we're never really going to be hurt so we keepdoing it and keep doing it you think we're exercising the rightthing so use the thing one of the number one things that and we're gonna gothrough this little checklist of what you can do is get out of the situationif somebody steps on your toes and brings the fight to you they pick on youthey talk shit they heckle you they insult your family or woman or whateverman get the fuck out of there why would you step into a confrontation when therewas no confrontation there why would you step into somebody else's war sure it'sdisrespectful sure man it's fucked up but man that person's doing it for areason that you don't know in most cases seeking some sort of power that isunfulfilled that has nothing to do with you now don't get me wrong it's notright there's still an asshole that's still a motherfucker but walk awaywalking away is one of the best things you can do yet I know what you're goingto say if I do that I feel weak if I do that I'm being a bitch if I do that I'mnot being out let's see you this goes back to it we live a life where we don'thave consequence we get in a fight with somebody we talk some shit we assertourselves we we bring the fire but we really haven't brought the fire wehaven't stepped in the ring the man I've lived a life where I've done that andbecause of that I respect it see if I were to actually get well put it on theline physically you know you know in our actual physical confrontation I've donethat it's cool a lot of times in fact it's a lot of fun a lot of times a lotof fun when you win but here's what happens when it gets out of handinevitably well you hurt somebody beyond recognition they hurt you beyondrecognition you hurt them and they come back formore revenge see fighting is something that doesn't just stop see it's greatwhen I do jujitsu and somebody submits or taps or I tap or whatever and it goesall way into different stuff than that but if you get a real real fight in thishappen to me where I armbar somebody say stop stop stop stop stop stop and youlet go because that's what you do immediately it come back to fight youagain you have to do something worse you have to incapacitate them you have tohurt them until they stop until they cannot there's so much pain or they'reunconscious or they are completely incapable of continuing that fight andthey are out of gas and guess what happens they heal that pissed offthey're angry takes them a day takes them two weeks takes them six months andthey come back for more you see man that's some of this bullshit you like wedon't live in a world where we have consequences anymore this should happenor putting on line with your family put it on the line with it's a fatherputting it on the line in your expression so we don't have enoughconsequence around that that we think talking shit or buying into somebody whowe don't know stepping on our toes is somehow a rite of masculinofucking walk away walk away respect the fight respect the other person respectthat they're coming from a place where you can't understand walk so this bringsus to the next thing what happens if we can begin our face to stop pushing usthere's that grab on our chick you start doing these different things well let metell you some number one most bullies don't pick fights that they know theycan't win they are trying to search for power or dominance or whatever it is insome way and to be honest I don't know I don't want to generalize them too muchbecause they got their own shit but most people pick fights that they know theycan win so why would I fight that fight you have to be able to end the situationand get out this is again one of the greatest life skills so if somebodycomes at me and they're disrespecting my chick I say hey man hey cool look we'regetting out of here obviously you have a problemin this way it's alright okay so nobody any the only pert the only way somebodycan fight you is if you fight back the only way somebody can fight you ifyou're cowering and fear and I get I can be afraid in these situations my voicecan be shaky I could be steadily stuttering my words but I need to gainthat composure to get out once again I know you might be thinking somebodysteps on my toes they insult my family they insult what I do me is the essenceof a man and I say hey you know what man obviously this is just gonna keep goingand we're gonna end it right here let's end it great great life skill to havefuck man am i a bitch Amaya pussy so what do wedo with that what do we do when we walk away and we feel that same naggingfeeling that we're less than as a man and see the road to masculine ease theroad to wisdom the road to power the road to you getting to know you is toughand hard and it's gonna come with so many days of walking away from stuff andnot means not being sure if you made the right decisionyou're gonna question it why because it was important you're gonna question itwhy because you know you could have done something you're going to question itbecause you feel you could have done more you didn't feel that it wassatisfied because you were in a situation that was intense whether youasked for it or not see this makes the man that's why you need to be a part ofa community is why you need to be around other people like right now on Sundaythere's all these guys talking and some of it I guarantee you I was on for thefirst two hours there's guys say man had a shit night last night somebody fuckedwith me a my old lady you know pissed me off in these ways and they don't know ifthey went in that situation with the right way maybe they watched away fromthem maybe they ended it prematurely but they don't feel that they fulfilledthemselves with man we need to be around other men doingyou need to be around other men who are living like other men who are carryingtheir own life who've been there before who are walking in your shoes two weeksago who are evolving in this way because here's the thing is we don't ever alwaysstab the answer we need a community to throught provide back so that ourinsecurities for our identity don't go out and attack and fight thesemeaningless Wars well we're put in front of somebody athousand miles away that we don't even talk to and that's how we're fightingmasculinity that's how we're defining ourselves that's how we're defining ourpower no man you go out there in the world and live it then you learn thewisdom it's a whole that power of man or you can be a guy that actually does stepin the ring and put it all on the line and soon you'll realize that the realroad to you is not always pressing that fucking atomic-bomb button it's notalways jumping if the quickest thing to get a reaction in the result but usuallyyou're paying in inspiriting is giving me that it's so much more than all ofthat masculinity being a man sex a greatthing learn to live your life learn to own itlearn to carry that beautiful beautiful torch of you that only you can defineand make that your life in any case guys thank you so much forwatching consider subscribing to the channel be a part of our communitiesclick the free stuff link and man what we do here is a broadcast for excellenceand if you're not working to live in that time you should stop we'll talksoon.